Tag Archives: social networking

Tips for Business Start Ups: Exciting New Website is a contradiction in terms.

Ok Harry, I know your business idea is going to occupy a special niche in your specialised niche market, and I get it that your finances stack up and that your social networking strategy has set fire to Twitter, but I’m disappointed when when you use the words ‘Exciting’ ‘New’ and ‘Website’ in the same sentence and in that order.

Websites are unfortunately not new any longer and to describe anything at all these days as ‘exciting’ demonstrates a real paucity of your stock of business adjectives. Nothing is exciting any longer Harry because its one of those adjectives that has been pummelled to death in trying to stimulate interest in products or services as diverse as coconut oil, flange sprockets and funeral services. None of these things are exciting and neither should they be.

‘Exciting’ is a word that should be reserved for events like falling off a cliff, demolishing a bank vault or being chased by a bull in a field – they’re all exciting as you’re putting your body and mind on the line, risking either impairment, arrest or death. That’s what an exciting life is all about – not getting an adrenaline rush by opening up a web page on google.

‘May you live in interesting times‘ might sound like a compliment when it fact it’s a stealth like curse: ‘may you develop an exciting new website’ has the same kind of promise – the promise of more tedious clicking, blinking and typing in registration details until you lose the will to live and phone for the exciting funeral director to relieve you of your pent up excitement.

Poetry on the Hoof: That’s enough about me, lets talk about me.

– Galled with the social net not working?
– Aghast at the babbling of the twitter stream, the facebook fountain?
– Paralysed by the anxiety, the bravado, the inconsequentiality of
– Every last tweet, poke, nudge and gasp?

– If there is nothing else to say,
– No more to be written,
– And you feel that you’ve sung every last note of every last cliche,
– Then this song’s for you.

– Enjoy the miracle of an on-line silence.
– Revel in the absence of opined opinions.
– Bask in the trivia gap
– Where every lapse
– Of taste, decorum and civility
– Is forgiven, forgotten and from now, forbidden.

-See, read and listen:

That’s enough about me, lets talk about me