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Sporty scruff
Sparky scruff
Just pissed up in the afternoon
Scruff.

Beery scruff
Hippy scruff
Permanent student in a beetle
Scruff.

Lecturer scruff
European scruff
We’re all mates together in a rugby scrum
Scruff.

Lectures seminars
Tutorials workshops
Doubting supremacist knowledge
Scruff

The only unscruffy ones are the Arabs, Africans and Chinese.
Do they know something we don’t?

A poem on the hoof: thanks to my favourite postgraduates.